First sight; July 2009

I remember the day when I first saw her standing across the passage. I had gone home to meet my friends. The instance is crystal clear even today, as many times in the last few years, the flashes have kept the memory afresh. Her hair was clipped with a bow-bip as usual – one single tie on centre top, the rest of the lock of hair just effortlessly flowing down. She looked at me – for a moment – I thought it was a stern look that any guarded woman would give to a stranger. But she didn’t look one bit of a stranger to me. The few steps between me her were the slowest at that time. She was wearing a dark – what looked like a black –red – dress. Standing side ways, facing what I now know as uncle-auntie’s room. She had just recently had a bath, her hair was recently dried – was probably getting ready to leave for work – it was 10:30 in the morning on a week day. The slow walk of 5 steps that seemingly took about 6-8 seconds to traverse felt elongated.


Getting to know her over the last 16 years, she has literally grown on me. All over the years

It was difficult to understand what I felt for her as I never brooded over all the various instances when either I felt weak, I felt sky-high happiness around her, I felt lost, I felt my body temperature drop because I felt my being froze in front her, I felt time stop, I felt… I just felt all these things and many more. But never understood… never gave the importance it deserved. All through the years, I lived with the feeling, enjoying them as and when I felt them. Finally a day came when she wasn’t there. I looked around attempting to find her – just to find that she was gone! I panicked.

Take me with you; July 12 2009; 1:30 am

You go deep
In to your heart
Searching
For something
Take me with you
I want to be there
When you find it

You wander
Away in your mind
Following your
Deepest desires
Take me with you
I want to see
Them get fulfilled

You follow
Your inquisitive mind
In search of answers
In search of loopholes
In search of your self
Take me with you
I want to see you
Go through the change

Take me with you
When you take the next step
Take me with you
Whether
it’s the mountains
or the back waters
Take me with you
Whether its me
Or someone else

Take me with you
Where you ache to go
Take me with you
Where your true being shows

Take me with you
When you go for a walk
Take me with you
When you want to talk
Take me with you
When you go out
Take me with you
When you want to shout
Take me with you
When you go to work
Take me with you
When the day reveals s a smirk
Take me with you
When you are at home
Take me with you
When life throws you out of gear

In the end
Take me with you
When you ascend from this world
Cos’ that’s my last hope
To fully be with you.

The Night, July 17 2009; 2:40 pm

The night is quiet
She was howling
Forcing herself against
The glass
I could feel her
But couldn’t see her
I wondered if it was me

I opened the glass
To let her in
The howling continued
But the night was quiet
Very very quiet.

Wanting you; July 12 1:00 pm

A drop of ink
Hanging above
Contemplating
Whether Or not
To let go

The water below
Standing still
Seemingly composed
And steady
The world can see
The water
Running deep
Happy and merry
But look within
You will see a void
As small as a drop
And as large as the water
Making it feel empty

The water
Waiting, longing, aching
Wanting the drop
To come
To merge
To fill the void
To change it
To make a new color
Bring it alive
And make it complete
The water is waiting…

Within
the water knows
It wont be before
It is born again
in another time
in another world
in another body
it would feel whole